A Good Lookin Year!

Less than a week into 2018 and I have to say, I really like the look of it.

I mean, actually the look of it.

Even the sound of it.

Two Thousand Eighteen!

Not sure why.

Maybe because the 8 looks a little like a snowman.

Or my Uncle Stew.

And Aunt Mazie.

Or possibly because it has a cool endless flow thing going on.

But maybe, just because, when I was growing up, 18 was kind of a teenage promise land.

For all intent and purposes you became “legal” at 18, whereas before, I suppose, you stood a little on the outlaw side of things.

At 18, back then, you could actually walk into a bar and buy a drink...a real grownup drink with a little plastic stick in it.

You could buy a ticket for any movie you wanted...without having to cover your face so your mom’s friend didn’t see you.

Hey, it was a fine piece of literature! I just wanted to see how they handled the film adaption...and that one scene with...oh...well...maybe not...

My mom’s friend might be reading this.

I could pretty much drive across state lines at 18, any time at of day or night...but only in my own car.

A lesson learned, pretty quickly.

And, not for nutin...it was just cool to say I was 18.

“Hey, I’m 17...how old are you?”

“I’m 18.”

“Cool.”

“Right?”

“Can you buy me some beer?”

“Sure...”

So maybe that’s it.

What?

I said, “Sure”...I didn’t say, I did....

So, for whatever reason, I’m looking forward to 2018...despite digging out from the “Blizzard of Yesterday”, today.

I’m thinking that’s not gonna be an everyday thing.

2018 has the potential to be pretty great.

Not that 2017 was all that bad.

It was alright...just not much to look at.

I mean 7s aren’t really much to look at.

Not like an 8.

And what good memories do you have about being 17?

It’s not even 16, which was a pretty cool year, in and of itself.

Hellooooooo, driver’s license!

Looking back, at 2017, in review, which is apparently something one is supposed to do at this time of year—in addition to wishing EVERYONE a Happy New Year...which is kind of silly since, you know there’s bound to be a few clunkers in the bunch, somewhere—I’d have to categorize 2017, at least on a personal level, as the year of “Improvements.”

Hey, I said on a personal level.

I didn’t invent the Electoral College.

I’m not even sure what the name of their football team is.

Maybe “The Inscrutables”

No, since it looked like 2017 was going to be a trying year, we decided to rob a bank and do some home improvements.

Ha...no, I’m kidding. We didn’t rob a bank.

That would be wrong.

It was more like a savings and loan.

So we decided to upgrade our HVAC situation—mostly because I also think it’s cool to say HVAC even though I have no idea what it means—and had a central air-conditioning system installed.

And since our house was built in 1927 that meant having ducts installed in every room, which really isn’t such a big deal once you get used to all the feathers.

Ha...get it...ducts-ducks....feathers.

I quack me up!

Sorry....

Sure, I was a little nervous about someone cutting holes in my 90 year old floors and plaster ceilings, but the entire process went pretty smoothly... plus the guy who fell through the hallway ceiling barely grazed me.

I was up and walking again within a few days.

We also had a not un-substantial marble hearthstone installed in front of our fireplace, because, you know...why not?

Not a big deal, but I was a little disappointed when I found out it had nothing to do with marbles.

And then of course the BIG Enchilada of Home Improvements...a brand new kitchen.

Which meant getting rid of the old kitchen, which is a process, especially in a house built, as I said, in 1927.

You can’t just slide it out the side door, you know.

Apparently....

I won’t get into too many details, right now, but let’s just say there’s a lot of noise and cussing involved...not to mention the racket made by the construction guys.

Oh...and  I ended the year with an early Christmas present...a case of Chicken Pox to enhance my holiday experience.

Maybe from all the ducks...who knows?

So don’t turn that page!

All that and more in 2018, when The Freelance Retort returns....sooner or later....

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